I am an emotional wreck and its ruining my relationship!?

Oh my goodness, yes, there is hope for you. You seem a bit anxious but not psychotic or raving out of your mind. Get yourself into that therapy ASAP; it will help you so much with your anxiety. You can just pour out your feelings with the counselor instead of with your man so you will feel calmer around him. You will learn some techniques to deal with your feelings, how to manage them better and be in control of them instead of them controlling you. Anti-depressants may not be the ideal medicine for you; there are a lot of different kind of mood stablizers on the market now and one of them might be a better choice for you; you'll probably need to be seen by a dr who can diagnose exactly what the problem is and how to treat it. In therapy you can discuss your abusive past and learn how not to let it control your future. You are young and have a lot of potentially wonderful years ahead of you once you get your emotions under control. If possible, when you feel overwhelmed, write down what is making you nervous or scared. Sometimes if you see them written in front of you, you'll realize that they really aren't that bad and you're just winding yourself up. It will be ok, I promise.